I Remember the Dance

I remember the school dance when I was about 11.  I was 2 to 3 years younger than most of my classmates and very awkward and self-conscious. There were two very intelligent girls in my class who were also quite pretty. Neither had ever paid much attention to me.  But, I surely noticed them. I gathered my courage and asked Judy to dance (she was the shorter one, not much taller than I).  She turned me down.  

Ouch!  I licked my wounds for a bit then tried asking Sandra.  I will never forget.  She said YES.  Wowee !  But, then we were on the dance floor.  The tune was "Put Your Head On My Shoulder." That would have been awkward for her since my head only came up to about her shoulder. We were surrounded by other people dancing.  I was stumbling around the floor stepping on her toes. Finally she drew me a little closer to herself and quietly said, "Relax, just feel the music and let yourself move with it."  Well, as a young boy in the arms of a beautiful girl I had long admired from a distance, it was not exactly the music I was feeling, but I did manage to relax a little and step on her less.  I will always remember Sandra as the most gracious young teen I ever met.  She was willing to put her social status at risk and dance with the clumsy young geek.  She was even willing to be kind and supportive to him. I lost track of her when we went to different high schools.  I pray that she has found great grace and fulfillment in her life.

Judy, on the other hand, went on to the same high school as I.  She was always smart and popular.  She ended up marrying a fellow who was popular and from a richer family.  I hope that he grew into a man who could be her equal.  But, she never could see that I was anything other than smart but socially graceless and insignificant.  Indeed, she seemed to feel about me the way I also felt about myself.

I remember as though it were this morning the day The Lord began to change the way I felt about myself.  It was my first year in college. I was just turning 17.  My classmates were 2 to 3 years older still.  But the gap from 17 to 19 is proportionally much smaller than the gap from 11 to 13 or 14.  One day I was in my room alone.  I had just taken a shower.  I was half dressed and combing my hair.  As I looked into the mirror, within me I heard the Spirit say, "Look at yourself.  You are not a bad looking guy.  In fact, some people might even say you are good looking."

Wow, where did those kind of thoughts come from ?  That was completely different from any way I had ever considered myself before.  Then more thoughts came.  Sure, other guys have more money than you do.  And they have cars.  But, you have brains.  You are actually smarter and can be more interesting than most of them.  You do not have to be an athlete for girls to like you.  You can compete with your own skills.  You can be thoughtful and kind.  And, do not forget, unlike a lot of them, you actually know God.

Now, I did not instantly emerge from my cocoon as a social butterfly taking flight with wings of beauty.  It took quite some time for me to learn a few social graces.  It was a slow process for the God of Grace to build in me the ability to see myself as not being a social failure.  But it was a process that had begun.

Do you remember Jesus at the wedding feast in Cana ?  How awkward He must have felt when His mother put Him on the spot.  He was very clear about telling her it was not His time yet.  But, even though He was not feeling ready, when she put herself at risk of embarrassment by telling the servants to do what He said to do, He reached into the depths of His own identity and came through for her.

Jesus said, "This is the work of God, that you believe in Him whom He has sent.”   When He said this, He was the only sent one.  So, He had to be believing in Himself.  Then Jesus told us that He is sending us in the same manner the Father sent Him.  That is to say, for us to see the works of God happening, we need to believe in ourselves as ones sent by Jesus.  Being sons of the living God is not what we do.  It is who we are.

Isn't it time for you to dry off after being washed with blood and immersed in Holy Spirit; time to comb your spiritual hair and look in the mirror and admit the truth.  You do look a bit like your handsome older brother Jesus.  You do have great riches from your Father.  You are filled to overflowing with love.  You have been transformed by the presence of Jesus and the Holy Spirit in your life.  You are a gift to the people around you.

As Paul wrote to the folk in Colossae, The anointed one in YOU is the hope of glory.

Enjoy being Father's sent son this weekend.

His, thus Yours,

Stuart